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18th February - not having the conversation but at least we are talking

Lately, my wife and I have been talking more than we have in a long time and being more open about our own opinions than we have been used to do. 

Not so open that I have shared all my own secrets about being trans, but it’s still good and puts us into a better place for when I ever am ready to do that. 

We talk a lot about feminism and women’s rights and the wrongs of male behaviour and negative masculinity. We are both on the same page really and I think she does now accept at least that I am not one of those men and nor do I represent men as a whole. 

We spent some time with her friends and one of them has found many (like a lot!) of half siblings from her biological father who seems to have spread his wild oats most liberally. Driving back we were talking about that behaviour and I observed that all men are bastards, to which she touched my hand and said not all. Which actually is the nicest thing she has said to me in a while! 

On the one hand I’m obviously pleased that she’s accepted that I’m not the spokesperson of the patriarchy, which is certainly how I have felt in some of the conversations we’ve had, but on the other hand, I don’t like being thought of as a man of any kind. 

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