Skip to main content

1 February - realistic goals for this month

Thanks to those who sent me encouraging messages after yesterday's post.  I may not have achieved everything that I hoped for in January, but I have made some steps, and those are cause for celebration, so thank you for reminding me of that.  

In retrospect, my original plan was a bit ambitious.  I was hoping to get a lot done in a short space of time! 

I think therefore in February, I should try to be a bit more measured and just aim to make progress on one or two key things.  

In my original plan, I would be starting the hormones this month, dressing female full time at home and coming out to my parents and sibling.  I'm not in a position to be doing any of that yet.  

In fact, I'm not able to do anything until I do the one big thing, tell my wife.  So really that has to be my goal for this month.  If I am able to progress in any other way, then I can view that as a bonus, but there is no point setting myself a target to do anything more, until I have done that.  

I did try and get an opening watching TV this evening.  There is an advertisement where the voiceover begins "what would you dream of if you could dream any dream?" or something to that effect.  The answer, apparently, is to go on a cruise although that isn't my dream.  So I commented on the ad and said to my wife "what would you do if you could dream any dream?". Naturally, after she suggests something, she would say "how about you?".  No.  She just shrugged and ignored the question.  Granted, it was a lame opening, but clearly I am going to need something better!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

11 Feb 2024 - how do you open a “coming out” conversation?

Feeling better today and woke up feeling feminine which was nice. Wife still in bed.  I could come out, but only to the dog! Went for a run instead.  2.75 miles which is 0.5 miles more than last week but the last bit was a struggle. We talked a bit but I didn’t say what I need to say. Now she has gone to shower.   I also didn’t say anything in the afternoon and then failed to say anything in the evening too. The problem is that it isn’t the sort of thing that neatly segues into a conversation. “Funny that you should mention penile inversion vaginoplasty…” is unlikely to ever come up as an opportune opening.   And it is the opening sentence that I think is the hardest part.  That is the moment of “shock” so needs to be not too shocking. After that, I think I will find the rest fairly easy as it is just telling my story.   I think that “I’m transgender” or anything like that is too big a shock statement.  I think that a softer introduction of “I wish I w...

21 Jun 24 - more correspondence from the gender clinic

I got details if the voice feminisation therapist through on the email and also links to the BMA and GMC guidance for GPs so I can do battle with the practice and see if they will help with my treatment by prescribing and doing the blood tests.  The voice coaching letter is interesting. It seems it’s not just talking in a higher pitch but also about resonance and it is that which makes the most difference. Which makes sense. The are women with high voices and low voices but they are all immediately identifiable as female, so there must be something other than pitch that signals this.  They also train for conversation, telephone and projection / public speaking as you use your voice differently in these situations.  Sounds interesting, maybe fun and most likely difficult to master.  I was visiting our northernmost office today and was hoping to be able to go out at the Mall on the way home, but there wasn’t enough time to fit that in. I am keen to have some more ...

15th August - why transition?

I ended yesterday‘a post with a question: if I can find joy in just occasionally seeing myself as a woman, why would I want to upset my whole life and go through the emotional and physical pain of transitioning?  Is this a good question? Or is it just my protective brain once again trying to prevent me from taking a risky step? Could be both?  Assuming it is a valid question to ask myself, what are the arguments for not transitioning?  I have managed to live my life with my secret for decades and I am fine. When I do get to dress femme, I like it and it brings me happiness, and occasionally real joy. Real life is mundane and I am sure that dressing female all the time will not bring me perpetual joy and happiness, it will just be my normal. With suitable underwear and the right style of clothing, I can achieve the outward appearance of a female body shape and look pretty good (mainly thanks to the advantage of height relative to size). I don’t need hormones or surgery to ...