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26 January - applying some "work thinking"

After yesterday's blog, one of my Twitter connections Joanne (@JoNextSteps) reached out via DM with the suggestion that I could try to objectively set out the pros and cons of my different options.  

This makes sense and is the way I would approach a project at work for a client.  I wouldn't just let them go around in circles never deciding anything (well some do, you can't help everyone if they don't want to help themselves). I would apply some logic and structure to the discussions.  I'd sit down and identify all the options.  There are usually one or two that are non-starters so don't warrant detailed consideration.  Then the remainder, we work through, understand the benefits, costs, risks, etc. and an informed decision can be made.  

This seems like a good thing to do for my situation. List my options.  Analyse each of them.  Choose the best.   

That feels like quite a big project and not something I can dash off in a snatched ten minutes writing this on a Thursday night, more of a weekend task. 

I guess I can set out the options though:

  • do nothing and live as a man
  • socially transition and live as a woman
  • fully transition and live as a woman
I mean there are many more.  I could live as a man majority of the time and socially transition at home or in certain circles.  There is partial transition (hormones but not surgery).  There is what I'm doing now which is ostensibly living as a man but secretly doing femme things for my own benefit.  And everything in between. 

Before I even start though I know there are only two options: full transition or no transition.  It really is all or nothing for me.  I either give up on the whole idea and accept life as a man, or I do everything.  

And let's be honest, I know which one I want already.  

So actually the exercise isn't about deciding which I want, it should be more like a risk assessment, identifying what the issues are that I may face in transition, likelihood, impact, potential mitigations or workarounds.  This might conclude that the challenges and risks are too great and I shouldn't do it.  Or that it is manageable and I can.  

OK, needs some proper thought.  

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