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11 Aug 24 - ebb and flow

There is definitely an ebb and flow with my feelings about gender. 

I’ve been experiencing quite a long ebb, for reasons unknown, but probably mainly distraction of other things. 

The tide has now turned and I’m having much stronger feelings that I need to express my femininity. 

Just wearing the underwear at weekends is helpful in connecting with my feelings and sleeping in the crop top adds to this as a sort of subtle comfortable awareness of my body.  

I have been thinking more about physical changes too and these thoughts have…ahem…moved downwards. I have always felt that I should have breasts and I have a fairly strong picture of what that might be like for me. My sense of what it might feel like to have different genitalia has been more fuzzy as I have no basis to relate to nor any concept of what the sensations could be. I have been thinking more about this lately, and maybe just from having done more research, I have a bit more of an imaginary picture of myself with a vagina. It’s weird and confusing but I feel mostly positive about the idea.  

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