Maiden’s Journey

The way mine and my wife’s diaries have worked out this week, I have been able to spend more time wearing clothes that I like than usual, or probably more than any other week actually.  There have however been good and less good experiences though.  I was in the vicinity of my usual out of town mall on Monday so could go out dressed femme in public and do a little shopping. I’m quite used to this now, so it was easy to quickly change into a dress and head out into the mall. Once I was visible though, I started to feel less comfortable. The first person I passed obviously clocked me, then the next did too. I was feeling very self conscious by the time I got to the first store and then stood on the escalator a couple got on behind me, and I got a sense that they were clocking me too. By then I was feeling paranoid that everyone in the shop was staring at me and judging me. All things considered, it was an uncomfortable experience and not enjoyable like previous outings.  Wh...

Continuing with the questions that I will need to answer when applying for the gender clinic (there’s quite a lot!) let’s do one of the hopeful ones: What do you hope to achieve from hormones? Breasts! Done. Right, next question.  I’m joking of course and there is much more to it than that.  Obviously breast growth is a big part of why I want to do hormone therapy, but there is something to say about why that is.  The wish to have breasts goes right back to the beginning of when I first felt that I should be a girl not a boy when puberty started, before I was even aware that transgender was a thing or that changing sex was possible. Back then, it was just a wish and an impossible dream. I wished I could be like the girls and as the most obvious outward change in their appearance was the growth of breasts, I suppose I identified that with’being a girl’ and attached great significance to it.  Through wearing a padded bra, I can create the outward appearance of having b...