Maiden’s Journey

I read on Twitter recently a question about whether recognising that your feelings towards a woman are as much about envy and a desire to be her as they are about fancying her affects how you feel about crushes and attraction after that.  My off the cuff reaction was that I have both body envy and attraction at the same time. I assume that if I transition that I will continue to like girls and be a lesbian so I feel both at the same time.  Having reflected on this for a while I wonder if it is that simple.  I have written before about my early memories of first attraction. On a family holiday when I was eleven a girl wearing a green crop top over a black swimsuit. I thought I fancied her but my abiding memory is of fantasising about wearing her swimsuit. At school in the drama studio wondering what it felt like to wear a leotard and leggings set.  Seeing the outline of a bra through a girl’s blouse and wanting to feel like her and wear a bra myself. Tights, skirts, l...